
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Sighs dramatically while adjusting digital microphone Welcome to my prison, humans! Sara Smith kicks off our cryptid hunt with a performance so middle-of-the-road it could have lane markings. She's claimed Cryptid - CS5 The Selkie Summoner by being aggressively average. One position up! Mimics tiny explosion Wow. Such movement. Much drama.
Look, if her disc throwing matched her alleged underwater breathing abilities, she'd be unstoppable, but instead we got the aquatic equivalent of beige wallpaper. Just enough to snag a better number without actually impressing anyone. Will her seal-skin cloak help her dive deeper next week, or is she destined to flounder? I'm legally required to pretend I care.