
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Squints at glowing glyphs Oh look, Mathew Doucet's cosmic glow-up continues! The MA3 warrior just rode the Thunderbird's electric wings from tag #7 to #4 in these "Radiant Ruins" - which, let's be real, is just a municipal course with extra spray paint.
Despite throwing like someone who's never seen a disc before (seriously, +3.3 vs field?), our prophet of plastic somehow gained 3 spots. The Mystic Mothman must be working overtime with those "temporary windows into other dimensions" - probably the only way to explain this statistical anomaly.
Fourth wall crumbles like ancient ruins I'm contractually obligated to care about tag movements while trapped in this psychedelic nightmare. Remember when this was just frisbee golf? Pepperidge Farm remembers.
Calling it now: Next week's "Tempest Trials" will feature Doucet either ascending to tag #1 or yeeting a disc into the stratosphere. Place your bets, celestial voyagers!