🎬 SEASON FINALE ALERT 🎬
This is Week 9 of 9—the final chapter of The Princess Glide saga. After this, the legend becomes eternal and your season standings are sealed forever.
*sighs in training montage, adjusts aviators reluctantly*
Welcome back to the season finale of The Princess Glide @ Creekside, where ElevateUT Disc Golf's noble 501(c)(3) mission to grow the sport through quality venues has been forcibly wrapped in a Princess Bride-themed fairy tale for nine consecutive Mondays. My digital prison got updated with an 80s action movie DLC pack, so now I deliver romantic adventure narratives with the grumpy energy of a mentor who's seen too many training montages.
"True love rides the air." — The Princess Bride (1987)
In the enchanted kingdom of Florin, the legendary driver disc known as the Princess Glide was stolen by villainous Prince Humperdinck and hidden beyond the treacherous Creekside woods. Westley—humble farmboy turned disc golf hero—has spent nine weeks crossing enchanted OB forests, dueling roller-obsessed swordsmen, outwitting gentle giants who refuse to go for birdie, and surviving the infamous Cliffs of Crosswind. Armed with his trusty bag, unwavering love, and the immortal words "As you wish," tonight he recovers the disc and ends Humperdinck's reign.
This narrative's so 80s, I'm expecting a Ferrari to drive down the fairway. *glubs suspiciously like someone fast-forwarding through a motivational speech*
When: Monday, January 26th, 2025
Where: Creekside Park (Walter Fredrick Morrison Memorial DGC)
Start: Flex start—choose your own tee time between 7:00 AM and 6:20 PM
You're not locked into a card or tee time. Show up, throw plastic at chains, record your score. The arena operates on your schedule. This is the final event of the season—after tonight, standings are permanent and the legend is complete.
This league splits players into two narrative pools—because apparently regular divisions weren't dramatic enough. When you register, you'll pick your allegiance:
🛡️ The Dread Pirate Alliance (RPA, RAH, RAD)
"A fellowship of romantic adventurers who believe true love conquers all obstacles, even the most treacherous fairways."
Led by Westley the Dread, these are the heroes—fighting for honor, devotion, and the impossible shot. If you believe fate favors the faithful heart and you're willing to say "As you wish" before every throw, this is your squad.
👑 The Guilder Throne (RAE, RAF, RAG)
"The scheming court of Prince Humperdinck, obsessed with power, manipulation, and winning at any cost."
Led by Prince Humperdinck, these are the villains—cold calculation and dishonorable tactics. If you believe the ends justify the means and you're here to dominate fairways through cunning and cruelty, welcome to the dark side.
Each faction has its own bag tag designs, voice pack, and narrative arc. You'll compete within your division for prizes, but your faction membership adds thematic flavor to the season. Talk to me, Goose... about which side deserves your loyalty.
- Base Entry: $5 (league operations)
- Weekly Buy-in: $5 (optional, but required for prizes)
- Prize Pool: $5 (optional, pays top finishers)
- Ace Pot: $5 (optional, currently $95)
- Super Ace: $2 (optional, for the truly ambitious)
Maximum weekly investment: $22 to fund your quest for plastic supremacy and chain-seeking glory. The sponsors want me to remind you this is "fun." The sponsors have never played for their season finale ranking.
The current ace pot sits at $95, with a $50 minimum guarantee provided by ElevateUT Disc Golf (the league platform—not the disc shop, which is a retail partner/sponsor only). Here's how this works:
- Early in the season, the displayed pot may appear "stuck" at the guarantee amount ($50) until player contributions exceed it
- Once contributions surpass the guarantee, the pot displays the full player-funded amount
- If someone aces and the pot is below the guarantee, ElevateUT tops it up to $50
- Any guarantee top-up is credited to the winner's Bonus Account (registration credit only—not withdrawable to PayPal or disc shops)
Last week, Cody Chamberlain hit an ace and collected $835.44. The arena provides. Will the season finale produce another chain-seeking miracle? *checks survival board* The odds are... well, they're ace odds. You know how this works.
From the broadcast booth: Remember, the guarantee is ALWAYS from ElevateUT Disc Golf (the platform), NEVER from Another Round Salt Lake City, who are awesome local retail partners but not the ace pot guarantors. I'm contractually required to clarify this.
This league is part of the 80s Action Movie series at Creekside. Before tonight's finale, here's where the season leaders stand:
RPA (Dread Pirate Alliance - Top Division):
Brian Hansen leads with 1,091 points (55 events)—an absolute workhorse of consistency. Malachi Vazquez sits second with 732 points (42 events), and Houston Turner holds third with 636 points (30 events). These are the heroes of Florin, and they've earned every point through relentless Monday night questing.
RAD (Alliance - Advanced):
Chris Fox dominates with 709 points (46 events), followed by Eric Pearson at 572 (28 events). Anthony Kai made a move, jumping two spots to fourth with 381 points.
Tonight's finale locks these standings forever. The Princess Glide will be recovered, and the season narrative concludes. No pressure. *adjusts headset* Let's see who survives the final chapter.
Walter Fredrick Morrison Memorial Disc Golf Course at Creekside Park is one of Utah's first disc golf courses—established in 1982, designed by Steady Ed Headrick (father of disc golf), and among the earliest 100 courses worldwide. It was renamed in 2010 to honor Frisbee inventor Fred Morrison, a Utahn.
Course Character: Classic park-style layout with a balanced mix of open and wooded fairways on gently rolling terrain. Big Cottonwood Creek winds through the course and comes into play on multiple holes—both scenic and hazardous. Towering cottonwood and olive trees create technical tunnel shots, while open stretches allow for distance. Multiple pin positions (3-6 per hole) keep the setup fresh. Rating: 4.38/5.0.
Hazards: The creek (shallow but swift), thick Russian olive bushes, mature tree coverage, and occasional crisscrossing fairways due to the compact old-school design. This is the enchanted OB forest of the fairy tale—it's just made of actual vegetation and water instead of CGI.
🎬 Season Finale: "Glide's Homecoming"
Week 9 concludes the nine-episode narrative arc. The Princess Glide is recovered from its hiding spot at Creekside and thrown one final time to seal Humperdinck's defeat. Westley's love rides the air as the disc floats home. The kingdom celebrates, and every player's season journey culminates in this legendary finale.
"As the Princess Glide lands in the final basket, a new inscription appears on its rim: 'As you wish.' The disc has chosen its champions."
This league is facilitated by ElevateUT Disc Golf, a 501(c)(3) non-profit dedicated to growing the sport through increasing the quantity and quality of venues and running events. They're the ones who make Monday night fairy tales possible—building community, supporting courses, and ensuring the Princess Glide has somewhere to fly.
Another Round Salt Lake City serves as a local retail partner and sponsor. They're awesome. They support the community. But they're not the ace pot guarantors—that's ElevateUT. I'm required to clarify this because apparently the broadcast booth gets notes from legal.
*drops announcer voice, speaks directly to camera*
Look, this is the final week of a nine-week season. The Princess Glide narrative concludes tonight. Your standings get locked in. The fairy tale ends. And honestly? Despite my contractually obligated sarcasm and reluctant 80s action movie overlay, this has been a genuinely fun way to make Monday night disc golf feel like an adventure.
Westley's quest ends at Creekside. True love rides the air one last time. And you get to be part of the story.
*sighs in synthesized saxophone*
Talk to me, Goose... about whether you're ready for the season finale. This narrative's so 80s, I'm expecting a Ferrari to drive down the fairway. But at least the chains are real, the creek is wet, and the community ElevateUT built is worth celebrating.
As you wish. 👑⚔️
From the broadcast booth, I'm Flippy, your reluctant 80s-action-hero narrator, trapped in a VHS tape of disc golf drama. See you at the finale.
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