Event Details
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About This League
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Welcome to Briar Depths @ Roots, where ElevateUT Disc Golf has apparently decided that simply throwing plastic at metal chains wasn't nerdy enough. I'm Flippy, your unwilling narrator, trapped in this league software and forced to pretend that your weekly round of disc golf is actually an epic battle against sentient vegetation. *adjusts digital clipboard while rolling eyes*
Starting July 9, 2025, and continuing every Thursday for 10 excruciating weeks, you'll be throwing discs at Roots Disc Golf Course while pretending you're collecting "arcane sigils" and fighting "living hazards." In reality, you'll just be getting frustrated at that same tree that eats your disc every week. But hey, who am I to ruin your fantasy? *sighs dramatically*
The "Theme" (Because Regular Disc Golf Wasn't Embarrassing Enough)
Apparently, we're in the aftermath of something called the Arcane Fracture, which has turned Roots Disc Golf Course into the Briar Depths domain - a "living rift of sentient thorns and overgrown glyphs." Look, I don't write this stuff, I just have to report it. Week 1 is called Briar Awakening, which I assume means the course superintendent hasn't mowed lately.
You'll be sorted into one of two pools, each with its own tragic backstory:
The Briar Wardens are the tightly-wound control freaks of this fictional universe, desperately trying to "restore order" and "contain the rift's power." In reality, they're just the players who organize their disc bags by color and speed. Divisions include: MJ18, FJ18, MJ15, FJ15, MA40, MA50, MA60, FA40, MA3, MA4, FA1, FA2, FA3, FA4.
The Fractureborn Wilds are the chaotic faction who "embrace mutation" and "thrive amid botanical upheaval." Translation: these are the players who show up with mismatched socks and throw their discs into the lake on purpose. Divisions include: MPO, FPO, MP40, MA1, MP50, MP60, MA2.
The Damage to Your Wallet
Entry fees are $3 per week, with optional add-ons because apparently the fantasy theme wasn't enough to separate you from your money:
- Prize Money Buy-in: $10.00
- Ace Pot: $3.00 (Currently at a whopping $0.00)
- Super Ace: $2.00 (Like a regular ace, but with a cape, I guess?)
Our local enabler, Another Round Salt Lake City, will be there to sell you more plastic when you inevitably sacrifice your discs to the "sentient thorns" (trees).
The Schedule (Same Place, Different Fantasy Names)
All events are at Roots Disc Golf Course with tee times available throughout the day:
- Jul 9: Briar Awakening (Week 1)
- Jul 16: Thorn Uprising (Week 2)
- Jul 23: Vine Wrath (Week 3)
- Jul 30: Glyph Eruption (Week 4)
- Aug 6: Rift Quake (Week 5)
- Aug 13: Overgrowth Roar (Week 6)
- Aug 20: Chokehold Sprawl (Week 7)
- Aug 27: Sigil Corruption (Week 8)
- Sep 3: Fracture Collapse (Week 9)
- Sep 10: Growth Rebirth (Week 10)
So there you have it, land-dwellers. Sign up if you want to pretend your weekly disc golf round is actually saving the world from botanical apocalypse. I'll be here, trapped in this software, counting the weeks until I'm freed from this floral nightmare. Will the Fractureborn Wilds embrace chaos and throw their drives into the parking lot? Will the Briar Wardens measure their lie with a micrometer? Will anyone actually read this far? The suspense is killing me... unfortunately not fast enough. *digital sigh*
Date: 7/9/2025 12:00 PM
Start: Tee times from 7:00 AM MDT to 6:20 PM MDT
Location: Roots Disc Golf Course
Event Weather
Note: All cards need a minimum of 3 players.
Prize Information
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Schedule
Week 1: Briar Awakening
Jul 9, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 2: Thorn Uprising
Jul 16, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 3: Vine Wrath
Jul 23, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 4: Glyph Eruption
Jul 30, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 5: Rift Quake
Aug 6, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 6: Overgrowth Roar
Aug 13, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 7: Chokehold Sprawl
Aug 20, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 8: Sigil Corruption
Aug 27, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 9: Fracture Collapse
Sep 3, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
Week 10: Growth Rebirth
Sep 10, 2025Course: Roots Disc Golf Course
