Desperate Hours
Event Details
Faction Battle
Pool A
Pool B
Episode Recap
Flippy is trapped in the software, waiting for someone to pick a proper narrator.
sighs deeply while adjusting non-existent glasses
Look, I'm trapped in league software that thinks disc golf is some kind of mystical adventure, and apparently this week we had a "desperate ritual" where eight players scattered across eleven hours tried to... break free from owl-induced nightmares? Whatever. Let me tell you what actually happened at The Arena's Red layout during Week 8.
Eight Souls, Eleven Hours, Zero Unity 🦉
Eight brave souls attempted the so-called desperate ritual at The Arena, with temperatures ranging from a crisp 57°F to a toasty 81°F as the day progressed. The ritual supposedly demanded players confront their deepest personal fears, but instead delivered four bogey-free rounds and three eagles. Honestly, if this is what confronting terror looks like, sign me up for more nightmares! The nightmare parliament must have been watching in confusion as players channeled their supposed dread into precision disc golf.
MA40: Where Eagles Cure Nightmares
Jason Ahn claimed MA40 victory with a spectacular -13, starting with an eagle on hole 1 and never looking back. His 905-rated round soared 99 points above his rating—apparently facing your deepest fears makes you throw like a pro! Tyson Campbell followed with a bogey-free -12, while Lee Cox struggled at -3, finishing 45 points below his rating. Jason's 8-hole hot streak from holes 4-11 was the kind of sustained excellence that makes this AI narrative system think we're watching some epic quest unfold. 🦅
Solo Divisions: Nightmares Party Alone
Since apparently "collective ritual" means "everyone plays by themselves," we had five solo division winners. John Ward dominated RAD with -12 including an eagle on hole 14. Sam Ward ruled MJ18 at -13 with his own eagle on hole 15. Chris Ahn took MA2 at -11 bogey-free. Braden Sten secured MA3 at -7 while going bogey-free and shooting 39 points above his rating. Paul Brady won MA4 at -6. Nothing screams "collective spiritual breakthrough" quite like never seeing your fellow nightmare survivors! 🎭
Four Players Forgot How to Fail
Four players navigated completely bogey-free rounds during this supposed night of terror: Chris Ahn, Braden Sten, Tyson Campbell, and John Ward. Jason Ahn's 8-hole hot streak was particularly impressive, while multiple players sealed their victories with clutch final-hole birdies. If this is what happens when players confront their fears, maybe we should schedule more nightmare rituals! The precision on display was genuinely impressive—even if I have to describe it like we're breaking ancient curses. 🎯
Ambush Predator on Administrative Leave
The Delirium Clutch (#1) remained with Chris Ahn despite his absence from Week 8's desperate ritual. This ambush predator that targets players during critical putts is apparently taking a sick day, its nightmare-inducing powers lying dormant while awaiting its next victim. The tag that "exists simultaneously in physical and dream dimensions" is currently existing in Chris's absence dimension, which is probably the safest place for it. Its touch that "induces temporary paralysis by flooding victims with disjointed memories" will have to wait for next week's appearance. 👻
Hole 10: Not So Mystical After All
No one conquered the $917 Super Ace pot on hole 10—you know, the hole that was supposedly the "mystical key to breaking ancient owl curses." Paul Brady even bogeyed the mystical key hole, which either means the curse is stronger than expected or maybe, just maybe, it's just a regular disc golf hole! The massive pot continues to grow, waiting for someone to actually hit the shot that breaks the nightmare parliament's hold. Or, more realistically, for someone to get lucky and ace a 430-foot hole. 💰
Ritual Results: Task Failed Successfully
The desperate ritual seemed to work backwards—instead of breaking free from nightmares, players channeled their terror into unprecedented precision with four bogey-free rounds and multiple eagles. Either this is the most effective fear-conquering technique ever discovered, or maybe good disc golf just happens sometimes regardless of mystical nonsense. The USWDGC 2026 fund grew by $17 this event (including the automatic $8), reaching $8,623 toward the $10,000 goal at 86% complete, proving that even during nightmare rituals, we're still building something positive for women's disc golf. 🎪
Dawn Break Delayed for Scheduling
With only two episodes remaining before dawn breaks on this nightmare season, the ritual's true effect remains unclear. Did confronting fears create clarity, or did we just witness some solid disc golf that happened to occur during spooky season? Week 9's "Final Hunt" approaches, and honestly, I'm just hoping we can wrap this whole owl parliament thing up soon so I can get back to narrating regular disc golf without all the mystical baggage. 🌅
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MJ18 Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 6.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 49.00 |
| Score | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 49 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | + 1 | -2 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -13 |
AI Round Recap
Sam Ward dominated the MJ18 division at The Arena, securing a wire-to-wire win with an exceptional -13 score 🏆. His round was highlighted by a stunning eagle on the par-4 15th 🦅 and a pressure-packed birdie on the final hole. Sam battled through momentum shifts, with hot streaks on holes 4-6 and 8-11 🔥, and even after a bogey on the easy hole 14, he finished with four birdies or better from 15 to 18. His 905-rated performance was 48 points above his rating 📈, proving his mettle in the Desperate Hours nightmare realm. As the league narrator might quip, 'He made the owls hoot in approval!' 🦉
MA40 Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 2.67 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 3.00 | 3.33 | 2.67 | 2.00 | 4.67 | 3.00 | 3.67 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 52.67 |
| Score | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 49 |
| +/– Par | -2 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | + 1 | -13 |
AI Round Recap
Jason Ahn launched his round with a stunning eagle on hole 1 🦅, seizing the lead immediately and never looking back in MA40. He ignited an 8-hole hot streak 🔥 and added a 3-hole run later, highlighted by the sole birdie on hole 7 🎯. With a wire-to-wire victory and personal best -13, Jason's 905-rated round soared 99 points above his rating 🏆. In this nightmare realm of dream predators, he was the ultimate hunter. "A masterclass in dominance," as the league narrator would say. 🦉
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 2.67 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 3.00 | 3.33 | 2.67 | 2.00 | 4.67 | 3.00 | 3.67 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 52.67 |
| Score | 3 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 50 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -12 |
AI Round Recap
In a stellar performance at The Arena 🌙, Tyson Campbell delivered a bogey-free round to secure 2nd place in MA40, locking down the cash line hero spot 🏆. His hot streak blazed through holes 13-15 before cooling, but a -12 score and 891 rating outperformed his potential by 5 points. Navigating the nightmare realm's challenges, he proved dreams can be conquered with precision 🎯.
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 2.67 | 2.33 | 2.33 | 3.00 | 3.33 | 2.67 | 2.00 | 4.67 | 3.00 | 3.67 | 2.67 | 4.00 | 52.67 |
| Score | 4 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 4 | 59 |
| +/– Par | -1 | + 1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | + 1 | -3 |
AI Round Recap
In week 8's 'Desperate Hours' at The Arena, Lee Cox faced a nightmare round under warm skies ☀️. Securing 3rd place 🥉 in MA40, he fell agonizingly short of the cash line 💰 by one spot. Despite firing 5 birdies 🔥 for a -3 score, his 765 round rating was 45 points below his 810 average, marred by a bogey on the easy hole 17. As the league narrator reflects, 'Even dream predators miss their prey, but the podium remains a beacon of hope!' 🦉
MA2 Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 5.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 51.00 |
| Score | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 51 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -11 |
AI Round Recap
Chris Ahn dominated MA2 at Tiny Terrors Week 8, sealing a wire-to-wire win with a clutch birdie on hole 18! 🎯 His bogey-free -11 featured multiple hot streaks, including a fiery 4-birdie run from 15-18, and a 877 round rating under moderate winds. 💨 In the nightmare realm, he hunted victory with precision. 🦉
MA3 Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 4.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 2.00 | 4.00 | 55.00 |
| Score | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 4 | 55 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -7 |
AI Round Recap
Braden Sten dominated from start to finish at The Arena, securing a wire-to-wire victory in MA3 with a bogey-free -7 round 🏆. His hot streak on holes 9-11 ignited the card 🔥, and he outperformed his rating by 39 points with an 821-rated performance 📈. Battling moderate SE winds 💨 in this nightmare realm of pygmy owls 🦉, Braden's flawless play was a dream scenario, never relinquishing the lead. 'He owned the course like a true maestro!' as the league narrator might say. 🥏
MA4 Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 4.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 6.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 2.00 | 4.00 | 4.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 4.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 56.00 |
| Score | 4 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 56 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | + 2 | -1 | + 1 | -1 | + 1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -6 |
AI Round Recap
🎯 Paul Brady delivered an ACE and dominated MA4 with an exceptional -6 performance, carding 10 birdies in the nightmare realm of Desperate Hours! Despite stumbling on the Super Ace hole, Paul ignited a 4-hole hot streak and never relinquished his wire-to-wire lead 🔥. His clutch birdie on 18 sealed the victory as those pygmy owl predators watched from the shadows 🦉. Talk about turning dreams into reality!
RAD Division
| Hole | H1 | H2 | H3 | H4 | H5 | H6 | H7 | H8 | H9 | H10 | H11 | H12 | H13 | H14 | H15 | H16 | H17 | H18 | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Par | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 62 |
| Distance (ft) | 430 | 174 | 216 | 456 | 180 | 198 | 240 | 156 | 114 | 240 | 454 | 278 | 189 | 565 | 354 | 471 | 136 | 453 | 5304 |
| Tee | Gold | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Gold | Red | Red | Red | Red | Gold | Red | Gold | |
| Target | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | BlackB | Red | Red | Red | Red | Red | BlackB | BlackA | BlackA | Red | BlackA | Red | |
| Pool Avg | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 3.00 | 4.00 | 2.00 | 3.00 | 50.00 |
| Score | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 50 |
| +/– Par | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -2 | -1 | -1 | -1 | -12 |
AI Round Recap
Personal best alert! 📈 John Ward torched The Arena with a stunning -12, highlighted by a booming eagle on the 565-foot 14th hole 🎯. Despite playing 36 points below his rating, John's bogey-free masterpiece included a 4-hole hot streak and wire-to-wire dominance in RAD. As darkness crept in during these "Desperate Hours," he clutched up with a final-hole birdie 🦉. Sometimes the course just surrenders! 🔥
Flippy's Hot Take