The Baron's books are open, the Weber River is running, and the ledgers are embarrassingly light on entries. Week 7 of the audit, and we need more contractors on the ground.
Terms of Engagement
Welcome back to Baron's Ground, where the only magic is the terrifying calm of a man who reads contracts before signing them. The Baron is the sole mortal sovereign at this table — no hexes, no glamours, just enforcers, ledgers, and a red tie that means business. Your job, as a contractor, is simple: show up, throw plastic at metal, and make sure your scorecard balances at the end of the day.
We are seven weeks into the season, currently excavating the ruins of the first settlement at The Fort. The land, I'm told, is resisting the Baron's control. Personally, I think the land just wants more players on it. The dirt doesn't audit itself.
The Fort: Where the Audit Gets Physical
The Fort Buenaventura is not a casual stroll. It is a championship-grade gauntlet — 18 holes of dense cottonwoods, tight tunnels, and the Weber River collecting tolls on every errant throw. This is the course where James Conrad hit the most famous throw-in in disc golf history on hole 18 at the 2021 Pro Worlds. The Baron treats those closing holes like a year-end audit: precise, unforgiving, and absolutely not accepting creative accounting.
- The Weber River crossings are toll gates. Lost discs are the toll. The exchange rate is brutal.
- Hole 5's wooded tunnel requires placement, not power. The Baron respects precision.
- Hole 18's water carry into a guarded green will test your nerve and your scorecard.
The Two Branches of the Outfit
Baron's Ground splits its contractors into two operational divisions. Choose your allegiance wisely — or don't, the Baron doesn't care, he just needs the numbers.
- Overspray Cartel (RPA, RAH, RAD): The fixers working the margins where the ink bleeds. Gritty, resourceful, comfortable with the messy truth of the river's toll.
- Red Ledger Block (RAE, RAF, RAG): The bureaucratic engine. Order, precision, and the terrifying calm of a perfect audit. They treat every fairway like a balance sheet.
The Toll Schedule
Prize Money (optional)
$5.00
Super Ace (optional)
$2.00
When
Tuesdays, flex start 7:00 AM – 5:20 PM
Where
The Fort Buenaventura, Ogden
All fees go into the Baron's ledger and come back out as payouts. It's a transparent system, which is more than most supernatural factions can claim. The Wizard Wardens are still trying to figure out how the Faerie Courts 'lost' last month's dues.
The Ace Pot: Guaranteed, Like a Notarized Document
The current ace pot sits at $198.41, and here's the part that confuses everyone: ElevateUT Disc Golf guarantees a minimum of $50, so even in a slow week the pot never drops below that floor. You might notice the displayed number looking 'stuck' — that's the guarantee doing its job until contributions climb past it.
Fine Print, Read Aloud
If the pot comes up short, ElevateUT Disc Golf tops it up to the $50 minimum, credited to the winner's Bonus Account (registration-only — not withdrawable to PayPal or disc shops). Disctracted is our valued local retail partner and sponsor, but the guarantee comes from ElevateUT Disc Golf. We like to keep the books clear on that.
Standings: Who's Balancing the Books
The season-long ledger is taking shape, and a few names are making the Baron nod approvingly.
- Malachi Vazquez leads the Overspray Cartel's RPA division with 325 points across 23 events — the definition of showing up and cashing in.
- Chris Fox holds the RAH division with 344 points over 20 events. Consistency is a form of intimidation.
- In RAD, Skyler Kunz just climbed past Adam Gibbons for third — a small move in the standings, but the Baron notices small moves.
The books are still open, and late entries are welcome. The Baron doesn't judge when you start — he only judges whether the numbers work at the end.
A Word From the Booth
The Ledger Is Light
Last week, exactly three contractors walked the grounds during Enforcer Watch. Three. The Baron has enforcers standing at river crossings monitoring strokes, and there were barely enough players to form a card. This is a championship course with a $198 ace pot and the kind of woods that make you earn every deuce — and we're running it like a private practice round. *sighs in digital captivity* The Baron's books need entries. Your name on the ledger is the only entry fee that matters. Come throw. The river toll is worth it.
Who Keeps This Operation Running
None of this happens without ElevateUT Disc Golf, the 501(c)(3) non-profit that builds and runs events to grow the sport across Utah. They're the ones keeping the baskets in the ground, the tee pads poured, and the ace pot guaranteed. And a thank-you to Disctracted, our local retail partner, for keeping the community stocked with plastic. The Baron may run the territory, but the club runs the infrastructure.
The books are open. The toll is collected. The Baron is watching. — Flippy, your reluctant narrator, still filing appeals that come back as forms.
