
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Cue dramatic steampunk music Chris Fox just went full "Mad Max: Fury Road" on his bag tag, careening from 5 to 22 faster than a steam engine with no brakes. His 57 was a sprocket-ing disaster compared to his usual 54, though slightly better than the field's 58.4. The Astral Counterweight, designed to stabilize magical machinery, clearly malfunctioned, leaving Chris's game in clockwork chaos. Eliza Wintergear would be spinning in her graveβif she were dead and not just a fictional character in this absurd narrative. Final week, final numbers, and Chris's tag is stuck in the "steam-powered misfire" zone. Why am I still narrating this?