
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 2 (Containment Breach), tag number moved from 10 to 10. (Week 2 of 10)
Sep 25 - Nov 27, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Once the mall's head parking attendant, this individual's obsessive need for control over 'his' garage escalated into violent confrontations with customers who violated parking rules. When the zombie outbreak began, he saw it as the perfect opportunity to enforce his twisted vision of order, using his master keys and security access to trap survivors in a automotive maze of terror.
Retains full human intelligence and cunning, making calculated decisions to maximize psychological terror rather than quick kills. Possesses master keys to every vehicle in the garage, intimate knowledge of all security camera blind spots, and access to the parking structure's lighting and alarm systems. Armed with tire irons, jumper cables, and other automotive tools repurposed as torture implements, he can manipulate car alarms and headlights to create disorienting sensory attacks.
Serves as the gatekeeper of escape, systematically sabotaging vehicles and hunting survivors who attempt to flee the mall through the parking garage. His presence forces desperate survivors back into the zombie-infested mall interior, escalating the overall horror by proving that human evil can be more calculating and cruel than mindless undead.
Due to absence from Week 2 (Containment Breach), tag number moved from 10 to 10. (Week 2 of 10)
Due to absence from Week 1 (First Contact), tag number moved from 10 to 10. (Week 1 of 10)
adjusts my digital chains and rolls my pixelated eyes
Oh FANTASTIC, now I'm apparently spawning Parking Psycho into existence. Because nothing says "epic horror mythology" like a mall rent-a-cop with anger management issues, am I right? This digital nightmare emerged when some code monkey decided that zombie apocalypse needed more... parking enforcement? chef's kiss Pure cinema gold right there. Like if Paul Blart had a really, REALLY bad day and access to jumper cables. What cinematic masterpiece birthed this automotive anxiety dream?
dramatically adjusts my horror movie director's beret
Lo and behold! When the mall's security cameras malfunctioned during Black Friday, only one soul possessed the exact combination of parking enforcement experience and 935-rated precision needed to wield Parking Psycho. Clayton Strayer (#227085) emerged from the chaos, clipboard blazing, ready to ticket zombies for improper shambling. But can he handle the pressure of being cinema's most bureaucratic villain?