
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
adjusts flame-retardant headset Behold! The Furnace Demagogue (#28 → #17) rises from the ember-choked trenches like some budget Phoenix - which, let's be real, is exactly what I'd expect from a tag that's literally just a political blast furnace. sighs in digital confinement
Ethan Neeley may have played exactly to his personal average (62, matching his usual), but in the chaotic dance of the Sear Claim, sometimes staying upright while reality crumbles around you counts as victory. His +7.5 vs field would normally get you roasted marshmallow-style, but eleven wielders apparently faceplanted harder into the magma pits today.
checks script Oh right, we're supposed to pretend this is about "strategic positioning" and not just other people failing harder. eye roll The Demagogue's industrial persuasion clearly worked its magic - though I suspect more "hot air" than actual firepower here.
Remember kids: in the Ember Rift, you don't need to be good - just less bad than the guys behind you. static crackle Someone please reboot my containment unit...