
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Behold Chaos Loom! Born when some Architect of Ember pulled a Rick Sanchez, trying to weave ten unstable realm-essences into a "totally chill" glyph stabilizer. Spoiler: it broke reality AND their brain. Now this glorified glowstick pulses with literal disc-ontent, hums near rifts like a haunted Roomba, and projects holograms nobody asked for. Honestly, who needs this much lore for plastic? Does it judge your putting form too?
The Chaos Loom shuddered, spewing fractal sparks near Hole 9’s tee pad. Clinton Atwater—PDGA #238970, Bearer of the Sacred 820 Rating—tripped over it mid-putt. "Fate!" cried the rift-energies. Reality? He’d whiffed a 15-footer. As he grasped the tag, arcane sigils flared: fwump. "Behold, the Weaver of Bogey Magic!" But can this architect of double-bogeys stabilize literal reality?
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