
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
As the newly forged Blaze Catalyst pulsed with chaotic pyro-essence, it scanned the mortal plane for conflict snacks. Suddenly - Kenneth Oetker (PDGA #266426) unleashed a scorching 961-rated drive... that promptly smacked a pine tree. "PERFECT!" crackled the sentient wildfire, bonding mid-shank to his bag. Destiny smells like burnt plastic, apparently. Can this bearer avoid becoming ash-tray material? 🔥🌲
(294 characters)