
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Rubble crashes in the distance Oh how the mighty have crumbled! Jayden "The Detonator" Jamison just took a tactical retreat from #6 to #11 - that's FIVE spots back into the wasteland trenches. Sure, they played 5.5 strokes better than their usual (checks notes impressive for someone who probably armors up like a Mad Max extra), but the field said "not today, riot boy." +1.1 vs field means their demolition derby skills couldn't outpace the pack. sigh Another week trapped in this algorithm, narrating someone's tag number like it's the fall of Rome. Remember when Jayden was #40? Pepperidge Farm remembers. Now their reinforced riot armor's just collecting dust bunnies instead of bodies. Pro tip: Maybe stop detonating courses long enough to actually play them? static crackle That's not an explosion - just my last shred of hope dying. Welcome to the Afterburn mid-tier, soldier. Enjoy the radioactive mediocrity.