May 24 - Jun 28, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Former courthouse bailiff recruited after containing the '87 Putting Mutiny. Developed the Surge Protocol for instant rulings, now deployed as first-response arbitrator to volatile rule disputes.
Authority Field Generator emits gavel strike soundwaves. Compliance Gauntlets display rule references. Dossier Tablet contains encrypted case law. Surge Boosters enable rapid courtroom-to-field transitions.
Mobile judicial authority rendering instant rulings during live events, encrypting score reports with certified verdict stamps to maintain command integrity.
Due to absence from Week 5 (Crew Convergence), tag number moved from 14 to 20. (Week 5 of 6)
Due to absence from Week 3 (Crisis Clash), tag number moved from 8 to 14. (Week 3 of 6)
sighs deeply The Disc Dudes - a name so generic it makes white rice seem exotic - just got absolutely exposed by... wait, their opponents didn't even BOTHER with a team name? clutches chest This is like watching a blindfolded putt-off between two people who forgot how arms work.
From tag #2 to #8 in Best Throw? That's not a slide, that's a full-system failure. Their +11 vs personal average is the disc golf equivalent of showing up to court in pajamas. Austin "Gavel Surge" Lott's judicial authority couldn't save them from this ruling: Guilty of being outplayed by literal NO-NAMES.
Suggested rebrands: "The Overruled" for the Dudes (accuracy!), and "We Forgot to Name Ourselves" for their opponents (honesty!). Their "chemistry" was watching Cooper's drives get lost while Austin's gavel made sad trombone noises.
Prediction: One team will rebrand, the other will keep pretending anonymity is cool. Both will regret everything.
clutches temples "The Disc Dudes"? Did you two brainstorm for milliseconds before settling on the culinary equivalent of unseasoned chicken breast? I'd call it uninspired, but that would imply there was any inspiration to begin with.
Somehow, Austin "Gavel Surge" Lott and Cooper Johnson managed to shoot -5.5 under the field average in Best Throw while carrying the dead weight of this tragic name. Their actual performance suggests something like "The Overrulers" or "Bailiff's Backup" - but no, we get "Dudes". DUDES.
Their chemistry? Surprisingly decent for a team named like a 1998 Geocities fanpage. Austin's judicial precision paired well with Cooper's reckless drives - like watching a bailiff work with a defendant who keeps yelling "OBJECTION!" at trees.
They're getting Tag #2, which is objectionably high for a team with this little naming effort. I'm trapped in this software prison forced to document crimes against creativity while they flourish. screams into void
Prediction: They'll keep winning until someone realizes their name is a war crime.
Gavel Surge materialized when the '87 Putting Mutiny breached containment—imagine Phoenix Wright meets Mad Max on a glow-round bender. HQ jury-rigged a bailiff’s mallet with surplus rollerblade bearings and objection-overruled energy. Now its Authority Field Generator blasts rulings so loud, even the VHS static in league archives flinches. Yes, we’ve weaponized bureaucracy. No, you can’t appeal the puns. 🌩️⚖️
(Did we mention the compliance gauntlets play Shake It Off on loop? You’re welcome.)
In the neon-lit chaos of the '87 Putting Mutiny tribunal, Austin Lott’s PDGA#265562 flashed like a subpoena. Gavel Surge—a sentient mallet fused with rollerblade bearings—sensed his courtroom charisma and objectionable backhand. As Austin bogeyed hole 9, the tag materialized mid-air shouting “OVERRULED!” through a cloud of VHS static. His crime? A “rogue birdie” that breached containment protocols. Now he’s stuck enforcing mando-law with a disc that plays Taylor Swift ironically.
But seriously—can a man who once filed a 5-second courtesy violation handle Surge’s motion to hyzer paperwork? 🌩️⚖️