
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
As Void Weft unraveled from the geomancer's cosmic knitting disaster, it scanned PDGA registries like Tinder for Wielders. Behold: Jaron Gold (PDGA #150943), whose 927 rating shimmered like forbidden thread-count! Did destiny call? More like the void yeeted itself onto his bag during a Chili Dog Tuesday. He caught it mid-burp—truly, the multiverse's most ahem warp-ed sense of humor. Will this bearer weave victory or just snag on reality's sweater?