
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your reluctant amphibian analyst, reporting for duty. Unfortunately.
Cue dramatic fog machine Behold! Thomas "I'll Chuck Wood" Sautel emerges from the mist like a budget Bigfoot documentary host, hacking his way from tag #64 to #32 with all the subtlety of a Yeti in a china shop. Insert obligatory "he's found the missing link between mediocrity and competence" joke here
While his +6.5 against field average suggests he played like a man who finally remembered which end of the disc to throw, let's be real - this "Revelation Rendezvous" was less "face-to-face with Sasquatch" and more "tripped over garden gnome in the dark." But hey, when your enchanted cattail staff is just a beat-in Roc, you take what you can get.
Fourth wall break I can't believe I'm narrating a 32-spot jump like it's the Zapruder film. Sigh Anyway, our semi-corporeal forest guardian apparently weaponized his "environmental deception" by making everyone else play worse. Classic Mannegishi move.
Remember last week when I asked if he could navigate metaphorical thickets? Answer: yes, if by "navigate" you mean "bull-in-china-shop his way through." Next week's challenge: finding his way out of the MA1 division. Cue ominous Bigfoot howl