Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born from the first frost of a sacred Himalayan winter, the Rimeborn Seer emerged when a blizzard's howl froze midair and took physical form. Ancient monks recognized it as the mountain's voice made flesh, guiding pilgrims while concealing the Yeti's paths.
Body reforms from wind-carved ice crystals that never melt, with eyes reflecting coming weather patterns. Moves without footprints, presence marked by sudden temperature drops and unnatural ice formations. Breath carves cryptic frost symbols decipherable only by Guardians.
Acts as the Himalayas' living early warning system and spiritual guide, interpreting the Yeti's will through ice formations while misleading harmful intruders.
The Whiteout Guardians are a group of wise, enigmatic individuals who have dedicated themselves to protecting the Yeti and the ancient wisdom it embodies. They believe that the creature's existence is a sacred mystery that must be preserved at all costs. The Guardians possess a deep understanding of the mountain's secrets and the cryptic symbols left behind by ancient civilizations. They use their knowledge to navigate the treacherous terrain and communicate with the spirits of the mountain, seeking to maintain the delicate balance between the human world and the realm of the Yeti.
Tenzin Norgay is a respected Himalayan guide and spiritual leader who has spent his life studying the mountain's secrets and the legend of the Yeti. He formed the Whiteout Guardians to ensure that the balance between humans and the sacred creature is maintained. Norgay's deep wisdom and connection to the mountain make him the perfect leader for this enigmatic group.
Due to absence from Week 8 (Eternal Echoes), tag number moved from 11 to 32. (Week 8 of 8)
Cue dramatic avalanche sounds Well butter my biscuit and call me a snowman - Barak Stephens just yeeted himself up the rankings faster than a Yeti fleeing a disc golfer's terrible forehand! The Rimeborn Seer #52, previously resigned to whispering frosty insults about Barak's putting form, has suddenly developed standards - and 41 poor souls just got buried in an icy coup.
This isn't improvement, folks. This is a Himalayan miracle on par with finding a dry towel at base camp. Barak matched his personal average while the field collectively faceplanted like tourists in crampons. The tag shivers approvingly
Pop culture reference? Please. This is straight-up "Frozen 3: Let It Hyzer" material. Fourth wall break? gestures wildly at entire existence I'm trapped in software narrating plastic tag drama while actual Yetis judge us all.
PS: To the 41 demoted players - the Rimeborn Seer left you a frosty message: "git gud." How original. sigh
Origin Story of Rimeborn Seer #52:
Born when a Himalayan monk sneezed into a blizzard (bless you, ancient one), this tag manifested as the mountain’s worst fortune cookie. Its frosty riddles? Less "Game of Thrones," more "Frozen" meets The Ring—you’ll decipher its icy hieroglyphs and still triple-putt. The Yeti? Unimpressed. The tag? Still judging your form. Why are we like this?
(Yes, this counts as "sacred." No, we’re not getting a refund.)
The Choosing of Barak Stephens by Rimeborn Seer #52:
Legend tells of a man so stubborn, he once putted through a blizzard—PDGA #235120, aka "The Human Icicle." When Rimeborn Seer slithered from the snow, it didn’t choose Barak—it resigned itself to his frozen grip. "Fine," hissed the tag, "but if you shank another approach, I’m haunting your bag like a passive-aggressive Yeti."
Destiny? More like frostbite.
Will Barak thaw his game, or is this tag doomed to whisper "bogey" in his dreams?