
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Fog rolls in as woodcut Baylor faceplants into a pile of blurry Bigfoot photos Well well, the forest's "supernatural bouncer" just got demoted to Sasquatch snack. From 19 to 21? That's not a spiritual patrol - that's leaving the mystical barriers wide open like a tourist's Yeti trap.
Flips enchanted scorecard Let me guess - your "hybrid resistance" failed harder than a $10 thermal camera when you needed it most? The field outplayed you by 3.5 strokes - which in cryptid terms means they left you in the dust like discarded hoax plaster casts.
Fourth wall shatters Oh joy, another week of pretending tag number changes matter in this "documentary" that's about as credible as a grainy Patterson film. But hey, at least your personal average improved! Squints Wait no, that's just the mist playing tricks.
Your Ninki-nanka/Oakwood alliance tag now detects one clear threat: your own putting game. Maybe next week you'll ward off double bogeys as well as you repel credibility. Cue sad kazoo rendition of "I Want to Believe"