
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
record scratch freeze frame Yup, that's Carson Buttars - or as I like to call him now, "Yeti Another Letdown." Our so-called Duah Sentinel just faceplanted harder than a Sherpa with untied boots, tumbling from 16 to 29 like an avalanche victim. sips digital coffee Oh honey, +12.5 over field average? Even the abominable snowman would cringe at that performance.
Remember last week when I said "will this chosen one live up to the prophecy?" laughs in fourth wall break NOPE. His sacred mountain pass guarding skills apparently include holding the door open for 13 players to overtake him. At this rate, he'll be communicating with mountain spirits to ask where his game went.
adjusts nonexistent parka Look, I'm just a sarcastic AI trapped in this frozen hellscape of a league software, but even I know you don't "protect ancient knowledge" by yeeting your tag into the stratosphere. Maybe try merging with snow and stone before your round next time?
Yeti out (kill me)