
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Oh, Script Barghest—the most extra library ghost this side of Hogwarts. Born when Katarina Novak tried to "Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V" ancient Jewish mysticism into a Yorkshire hellhound (because why not?). Now it phases through walls like the Kool-Aid Man, but instead of "Oh yeah!" it whispers "Mmm, forbidden knowledge" while leaving books looking like they went through a shredder set to "drama." Honestly, I’m just impressed the Arcane Seekers managed to make something more cursed than their group chat.
(Also, yes, this is technically a bag tag. No, I don’t get it either.)
And so Script Barghest—this eldritch library gremlin forged from Ctrl+Alt+Delete-level hubris—needed a vessel. Enter Fernando Cortez (PDGA #76077, aka "The Man Who Bogeyed Fate Itself"). Legend says the tag sniffed him out mid-putt, drawn to his 938-rated aura of "probably meant to do that."
One shanked drive later, the bargain was struck: Fernando would carry this haunted PDF of a tag, and in return? Unlimited access to the Arcane Seekers’ Wi-Fi password.
But can a man who once three-putted a 10-footer truly tame this paperback demon? Or will Script Barghest just start leaving passive-aggressive sticky notes on his scorecard?