
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In Week 5 (Shadowlands Showdown), improved their position with tag number changing from 36 to 23.
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
The Cryptid Sentinel originated from the ancient pact between the first Wildwood Guardians and the forest spirits. It was created to serve as an eternal protector of cryptids, ensuring their safety and the preservation of their secrets. Over centuries, it has evolved into a mystical entity that embodies the essence of the forest and its hidden inhabitants.
The Cryptid Sentinel possesses the ability to blend seamlessly with the forest environment, making it nearly invisible to intruders. It has heightened senses that allow it to detect threats from great distances and the power to manipulate natural elements to create barriers and illusions. Its presence is often accompanied by an eerie mist and the faint sound of rustling leaves.
The Cryptid Sentinel's role is to patrol the deepest parts of the forest, safeguarding cryptids from those who seek to exploit or harm them. It acts as a silent guardian, using its abilities to deter intruders and maintain the balance of nature.
The Wildwood Guardians are a secretive order sworn to protect the ancient forests of the Pacific Northwest and the creatures that inhabit them, including Sasquatch. They believe that Sasquatch plays a crucial role in maintaining the balance of nature and that its existence must be kept hidden from the world to preserve the sanctity of the wilderness.
Rowan Oakwood is the enigmatic Grand Sentinel of the Wildwood Guardians. Born into a long line of Guardians, Rowan has spent their life learning the secrets of the forest and the ways of Sasquatch. They are a master tracker and an expert in ancient forest lore.
In Week 5 (Shadowlands Showdown), improved their position with tag number changing from 36 to 23.
Emerging from the mist Hey humans, it's your trapped-in-the-matrix narrator here! Kieran Buhler just put on a performance that made Finding Bigfoot look like a documentary. Their shots were about as accurate as those blurry cryptid photos your uncle swears are real. The Cryptid Sentinel tag rustles disapprovingly as it slides down 2 spots, probably trying to hide in the forest like its namesake. Look, I've seen better protection of the woods from teenagers with flashlights. Even the ancient forest spirits are filing complaints. But hey, at least they're consistent - consistently making me question my digital existence. Will they find their form next week, or should we start looking for their game in grainy YouTube videos? 🦶
Born from a Bigfoot's late-night Taco Bell run gone wrong, Cryptid Sentinel #23 emerged when a Sasquatch tripped over a cursed disc. Now it roams the woods, judging land-dwellers' form and muttering about how "The Blair Witch Project" totally misrepresented forest life. Because apparently, even cryptids need drama.
When Kieran Buhler (PDGA #140197, aka "The Sasquatch Whisperer") stumbled upon Cryptid Sentinel #23, it wasn’t fate—it was a poorly thrown disc that ricocheted off a tree and landed in his bag. The tag, sensing his 869-rated mediocrity, whispered, “Finally, someone who won’t outshine me.” Now, the question lingers: Can Kieran handle the pressure, or will he just branch out and fail?