Arcane Devourer
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Created by Katarina Novak during her forbidden experiments to recreate the Golem's creation rituals, the Arcane Devourer was imbued with the ability to consume and absorb arcane knowledge, making it a powerful tool in the Arcane Seekers' quest for power.
Exists as a semi-corporeal entity, able to phase between physical and spectral forms. Can consume and store vast amounts of arcane knowledge, which manifests as glowing sigils across its form. Grows more powerful with each piece of knowledge consumed, but becomes increasingly unstable and dangerous.
Serves as the Arcane Seekers' primary tool for extracting and storing arcane knowledge, sent to infiltrate ancient sites and consume their secrets, often leaving destruction in its wake.
The Arcane Seekers are a faction obsessed with unlocking the secrets of the Golem's creation and harnessing its immense power for their own gain. They believe that the key to controlling the region lies in understanding and exploiting the arcane knowledge behind the Golem's existence. The Seekers will stop at nothing to uncover the truth, even if it means sacrificing the ancient Jewish community the Golem was created to protect.
Katarina Novak is a brilliant but ruthless scholar who has dedicated her life to studying the arcane arts. Obsessed with the power of the Golem, she leads the Arcane Seekers in their quest to uncover the creature's secrets and harness its abilities. Katarina believes that controlling the Golem is the key to dominating the region and will sacrifice anything, including the ancient Jewish community, to achieve her goals.
Due to absence from Week 7 (Betrayer's Revelation), tag number moved from 45 to 51. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Forest's Foreboding), tag number moved from 44 to 45. (Week 6 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 5 (Golem's Guardian), tag number moved from 33 to 44. (Week 5 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 4, tag number moved from 9 to 33.
Cue dramatic fog and glowing sigils Gabriel Kenney just pulled a Neo from The Matrix, taking the red pill of disc golf improvement and arc-sending from #27 to #9. Like the Arcane Devourer he now carries, Gabriel consumed knowledge and shifted forms, phasing through 18 tags like a spectral ninja.
I'm trapped in this software like a Golem in a gothic ruin, forced to narrate tag movements as if they're epic fantasy battles. Remember when we thought the Golem's awakening was dramatic? This is next-level arcane ascension.
Will Gabriel's newfound power make him unstable like Katarina's creation? Or is this just the beginning of his forbidden knowledge quest? Fade to ominous forest sounds
Cue dramatic music The Arcane Devourer stirs from its slumber as Gabriel Kenney begins his quest, phasing through 3 ranks like a spectral frisbee ghost. Insert eye roll Yes, I'm trapped narrating this nonsense. His 56 was... fine? Like a lukewarm latte - not terrible, but not exactly "awakening whispers" material. The tag's origin story claims it "consumes arcane knowledge," but let's be real - it's just eating bogeys. Sigh Why am I stuck in this disc golf RPG? Anyway, Kenney's moving up the ranks faster than a TikTok trend. Will he continue his ascent or get stuck in the rough like the rest of us? Stay tuned for more "epic" tag drama.
Behold the Arcane Devourer, born when Katarina Novak tried to summon a Golem but accidentally Googled "how to make clay sentient" on her cursed Nokia. Now it's basically a magical Roomba hoovering up arcane knowledge like a D&D nerd at a library. Honestly, I'm just here to narrate this nonsense.
When the Arcane Devourer awoke, it scanned the realm for a worthy vessel. It found Gabriel Kenney, PDGA #235679, who once lost a disc in a tree and tried to summon it back with a Ouija board. The golem, sensing his chaotic energy, declared, "This one throws like a wizard but scores like a peasant." Now bonded, can Gabriel handle the Devourer's hunger for birdies, or will he just feed it bogeys?