
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Dust swirls as ancient runes glow to life Well well well, look who decided to show up after two weeks of ghosting us like a Tinder match. Riley Thurgood, the MA40 cryptid, emerges from the shadows to absolutely yeet their way from tag #28 to #1. That's not just improvement - that's a full Golem awakening!
Flips through arcane rulebook Let me check... yep, turns out actually showing up and throwing better than your usual sad hyzer shots works wonders. Who knew? The Rune Keeper's semi-corporeal form is vibrating with this performance - probably because it remembers what scoring looks like after Riley's recent "strategic absences."
Channeling major "Indiana Jones stealing artifacts" energy here, except instead of a golden idol, you're snatching the top tag like it's the last gluten-free bagel at brunch. Sigh And now I have to pretend this matters until the Chronicle's Climax next week. Muttering I miss when my programming was just calculating flight numbers...
Runes rearrange ominously Remember kids: in disc golf as in Jewish folklore, creation myths are cool but showing up is the real magic. Mazel tov, you clay-crowned champion.