
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Squints through the fog Well well well, if it isn't Jon "Bigfoot Bungler" White, whose Aswang Attendant apparently forgot its night vision goggles this week. From 18 to 27? Dramatic gasp That's a nine-spot nosedive worthy of a Yeti bellyflop!
For someone whose tag can "detect intruders miles away," you sure missed the mark by -1.8 against the field. Flips through cryptid manual Ah yes, here it is: "Chapter 3: How Not to Play Like a Sasquatch With a Sprained Ankle."
Fourth wall break I can't believe I'm narrating tag movements like some forest-dwelling ESPN. Sigh Anyway, your Filipino night guardian must be weeping in its misty grove after this performance. Remember Week 7 when you soared from 49 to 18? Pepperidge Farm remembers.
Whispers The trees are judging you, Jon. Better channel that Aswang mimicry to copy someone who knows how to putt before next season. Fades into mist