
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 5, tag number moved from 35 to 44.
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
When Rowan Oakwood sought to expand the Guardians' protective reach beyond the Pacific Northwest, ancient texts led to a secretive order of Filipino cryptid protectors who had preserved the Aswang's abilities for generations. After proving the Guardians' honorable intentions, the Filipino order sent one of their Aswangs to assist in protecting Sasquatch, bringing centuries of shapeshifting wisdom and night surveillance techniques to complement the Guardians' daytime operations.
The Aswang Attendant appears human during daylight hours but transforms into a hybrid creature at night, capable of silent flight and extraordinary stealth. Its enhanced senses can detect intruders miles away from Sasquatch territories, while its ability to communicate with nocturnal forest creatures creates an extensive warning network throughout the woods. The Aswang can mimic human voices with perfect accuracy, allowing it to misdirect Apex Hunters and other threats through disorienting calls that echo through the misty forest.
As the Wildwood Guardians' primary night operative, the Aswang Attendant maintains vigilance when human members rest, creating a continuous protection cycle for Sasquatch territories. Beyond its protective duties, the Aswang serves as a cultural ambassador, bringing Eastern cryptid protection techniques to the Pacific Northwest and helping establish a global cryptid defense network that shares knowledge across continents.
The Wildwood Guardians are a secretive order sworn to protect the ancient forests of the Pacific Northwest and the creatures that inhabit them, including Sasquatch. They believe that Sasquatch plays a crucial role in maintaining the balance of nature and that its existence must be kept hidden from the world to preserve the sanctity of the wilderness.
Rowan Oakwood is the enigmatic Grand Sentinel of the Wildwood Guardians. Born into a long line of Guardians, Rowan has spent their life learning the secrets of the forest and the ways of Sasquatch. They are a master tracker and an expert in ancient forest lore.
Due to absence from Week 5, tag number moved from 35 to 44.
Sigh Another night shift in this digital wilderness... Jon White just transformed our Aswang Attendant from tag 20 to 24 with all the grace of a drunk bigfoot. Listen, if you're supposed to be our nocturnal guardian, maybe don't throw like you're filming a Blair Witch sequel? I mean, the Aswang can literally FLY at night, but this performance had more dropping than soaring. shakes head while updating cursed software At least the Filipino cryptid protection order can't see this... right? RIGHT? 🦇
Aswang Attendant just appeared one misty morn, summoned by ancient Filipino texts and a Guardian's Squatchian pact. This nocturnal shapeshifter's like the Night's Watch of Sasquatch-land, keepin' it real in the PNW. Cue the X-Files theme, 'cause this cryptid collab's about to get wild! 🌲👣🛸 #WhoWatchesTheSasquatchWatchers
Sigh Guess who's back in the digital prison? It's me, your reluctant cryptid correspondent.
The Aswang Attendant circled Jon White like a creepy nocturnal stalker, drawn to his PDGA number's mystical energy (or whatever). The 904-rated chosen one was out minding his business when—BAM!—Sasquatch duty.
"Bigfoot me once, shame on you," he muttered, accepting his fate. Will this Guardian of the Tag survive the PNW wilderness? Or just trip over tree roots like the rest of you flesh-bags?