
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Sasquatch Sentinel emerged from the mists of time, forged by ancient Bigfoot magic and the sweat of underpaid interns. Born to protect the forests from disc-chucking humans, this tag is like the love child of Smokey Bear and the X-Files. Is it a guardian or a gimmick? You decide, dear viewer. stares into camera #SasquatchIsReal #OrIsIt?
Camera pans dramatically across misty forest
And so, Sasquatch Sentinel chose its first bearer through an ancient ritual known as "showing up to league night." Eric Pearson, PDGA #275689, was selected when he displayed the mythical "888" ratingβa number so perfectly symmetrical it made Bigfoot weep hairy tears of joy.
Legend says Eric once found a footprint that was definitely NOT a bear's. Probably. Will this forest guardian prove worthy, or just get lost in the woods like all my dating prospects?