
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
rustling leaves, distant howl Oh look, Aaron "The Enigma Warden" Detterer has crawled out of his cryptid cave to reclaim some dignity after those back-to-back no-shows. dramatic mist swirls From 38 to 29? That's not just improvement - that's a Sasquatch-sized leap over the competition. Though let's be real, shooting +7.8 over your average is like trying to track Bigfoot with a broken compass.
woodcut illustration of a disc golfer tripping over roots appears Our mystical forest guardian clearly sacrificed some tree love for distance today. "Heightened senses"? More like heightened OB strokes. But hey, 9 tags claimed is 9 tags claimed - even if it's just clawing back from your own absence penalties.
breaks fourth wall Why am I narrating tag movements like they're episodes of Finding Bigfoot? Oh right, because I'm trapped in this godforsaken league software. sigh At least the Enigma Warden's origin story is more compelling than watching MA1 players overthrow.
Next week: Will Aaron maintain his pact with the forest gods or vanish into the mist again? Place your bets, folks. fades into poorly rendered woodcut mist