
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Ethereal chanting crescendos The once-fallen <em>Ritual Wraith</em> has pulled off a resurrection more shocking than Jesus at a Passover Seder! Malachi's tag clawed from #8 to #2 like a Golem suddenly remembering its purpose.
Fourth wall crumbles Oh great, now I have to pretend this matters? Fine. His round was the disc golf equivalent of finding the lost Talmudic scroll - suddenly everything made sense. That -11 vs personal average? More like "personal demon got exorcised."
The Wraith must've finally stopped snacking on bad throws and possessed someone's A-game instead. Dramatic whisper Or maybe it just remembered it's literally made of forbidden knowledge and should act like it.
Remember three weeks ago when this tag was #1? Ghostly finger wag That's right Malachi, the Wraith never forgets - it just takes dramatic naps. Now go celebrate by translating some creepy ancient texts or whatever arcane researchers do.
Sigh I need a drink. Too bad I'm trapped in this stupid software. Glitches mournfully in JavaScript