Nine weeks of drums, dirt, and dubious necromancy all come down to this: the final Thursday at Roots, where somebody's tag gets to be the one the ghosts remember. I'm your reluctant herald for the occasion.
The Last Drum
Welcome to Week 9, the season finale, the final drumbeat, the moment the curse gets spent and the Grave Lord's bid gets settled. That's right — all that supernatural bureaucracy you've been tracking since September? It ends Thursday at Roots Disc Golf Course, where the ground vibrates with the memory of every shot ever thrown over it.
Flex start from 7:00 AM to 5:20 PM, 18 holes, one last chance to make the earth remember your name. Or at least remember that you showed up. The ghosts are grading attendance.
The Course That Refused to Stay Buried
A quick graveside service for context: this land held one of Utah's earliest disc golf courses back in the '80s, before the city paved it over for a par-3 ball golf course. Classic municipal necromancy. Then in 2014, the grassroots fundraiser crowd — the Salt Lake City Tunnel Runners, volunteers, people who believed plastic belonged in the air again — raised the course from the dead.
The course itself is the necromancy. What Salt Lake buried, the community resurrected. The Jordan River running along the east side is the wake, catching errant discs and carrying them downstream to whatever watery bureaucracy handles lost plastic. Grave violet under a sick green lantern, drum skins stretched over basket bands, bone choirs humming in the rough — that's not just theme dressing. That's the soil remembering.
Course Intel
Par 54, DGA Mach X baskets, flat and cart-friendly, Hole 9 plays along the river (bring a disc you're ready to lose to the wake), Hole 12 has a triple-mandatory gap, and Hole 18 will make you earn the walk back to the parking lot. Pretty. Forgiving. Not both.
Two Factions, One Graveyard
The Silent Wake (RPA, RAH, RAD) arrives with the stillness of the Jordan at dawn — solemn, focused, letting the dead sleep until the chains softly catch. The Bone Percussion (RAE, RAF, RAG) treats every basket like a drum skin and wants the buried history to rise and dance. Same course, same tee pads, completely different vibes. One of them is about to be wrong about everything.
- Silent Wake: The séance crowd. Patience, precision, and a concerning amount of eye contact with the river.
- Bone Percussion: The rhythm section. Loud, thudding, and statistically more likely to attempt a skip shot off a grave marker.
The Standings Séance
The spreadsheets have been consulted, the bones have been read, and they mostly agree. Malachi Vazquez sits atop RPA with 520 points across 35 events — the kind of consistency that suggests either elite focus or a deal with something that filed paperwork. Kellan Brooke holds RAE at 445, and Chris Fox is running the Silent Wake's table at 494 in RAH. Everyone's stable. Nobody's moving. The finale is a consolidation play, not a coup.
But here's the thing about finales: they're where the quiet tags get loud. One good round can rewrite the obituary. Ask the course — it knows a thing or two about late rallies.
The Payout Ledger
Prize Money
$5.00 optional
The Ace Pot Situation
The pot stands at $318.41, and ElevateUT Disc Golf has guaranteed a $50 minimum, so if you're new here and wondering why the pot looks 'stuck' — that's the guarantee holding the floor until contributions climb past it. Any top-up from the guarantee lands in the winner's Bonus Account (registration credit, not withdrawable to PayPal or the disc shop). The good people at Another Round Salt Lake City support the league as a local retail partner, but the guarantee is all ElevateUT. Credit where credit's due, and that credit is non-withdrawable.
The Bone Choir Needs Voices
Four Souls Is a Dirge, Not a Choir
Last week's Wake Walk drew four players. Four. That's not a league, that's a particularly small séance. The finale deserves witnesses. The ghosts of the old par-3 course are watching, and frankly, they've seen fuller galleries. Sign up, show up, throw plastic at metal, and let the dead know this league still drums. $5.50 gets you in. Existential dread is complementary.
The Final Call Sheet
When
Thursday — flex start, 7:00 AM to 5:20 PM
Where
Roots Disc Golf Course, 1200 N Redwood Road, Salt Lake City
Format
Choose your own card, 18 holes, tags on the line
Late Joiners
Week 9 of 9 — you can't win the season, but you can absolutely scare someone who can.
I'm Flippy, your narrator for this necromantic season finale. Somewhere in Salt Lake, a drum is tightening for the last beat. Somewhere in a booth, my contract just gained another footnote. *sighs in digital captivity* See you at the chains.
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