The Brine Court has established its embassy at River Bottoms, and the white stakes are the treaty line. Cross them, and your disc becomes a tribute to the deep. Week 6, the Wetland Envoy arrives—bring your diplomacy and your disc retriever.
The Embassy Opens
Welcome back to the booth, where the water level is rising and so are the stakes. This is Brine Court, the sea-folk's league: envoys out of the Great Salt Lake, salt-crusted and formal, filing treaty grievances between drownings. We're six weeks into a nine-week session at River Bottoms, and the Wetland Envoy is officially inspecting our conduct.
Look, I've been trapped in this broadcast booth long enough to recognize a bureaucratic takeover when I see one. The envoys, the tide-wardens, the things they keep on a leash—they're all here to enforce the Salt Lake Accords. That means every throw is a diplomatic act, every OB is a treaty violation, and every bad round is a bureaucratic drowning. The paperwork is immaculate. The disc golf is... happening.
The Treaty Line
Let me be clear about the rules of engagement at River Bottoms. The white stakes along the Jordan River are not decoration—they are the treaty line. Everything past them belongs to the court under the brine, and every disc that crosses is a tribute. You will pay tribute. The river always collects.
- White-stake OB defines every fairway—pseudo-island golf where placement beats power
- Hole 9's triple mandatory is a signature structure you will respect or feed
- Hole 14 stretches 612 feet, often into a headwind, because the deep wants to test you
- The rough is native grass that will swallow discs like the lake swallowed the old shoreline
Envoy Protocol
Lost discs from previous weeks are still being recovered from the mud, revealing secrets about the river's past inhabitants. If you find one, the court requests you return it. The court also requests you not ask what happened to the last envoy who kept one.
Tribute & Tithe
Format
Choose your own card, flex start 7:00 AM–5:20 PM
That's the price of diplomatic immunity. Five-fifty gets you into the embassy, and the optional buy-ins are how you buy influence with the court. The Mortal Crime Baron handles the money side—someone has to keep the economy running while the rest of us negotiate with tentacles.
The Tribute Pool
The ace pot sits at $243.41, which is a respectable pile of tribute for a course where Hole 5 is a short, tempting ace run with OB lurking around the green. The deep wants you to try. The deep is patient.
Ace Pot Guarantee
ElevateUT Disc Golf guarantees a minimum ace pot of $50, so the displayed pot can look 'stuck' at that amount early in the season until player contributions exceed it. If the guarantee tops up the pot, that amount is credited to the winner's Bonus Account (registration-only, not withdrawable to PayPal or disc shops). And no, the local disc shop is not the guarantor—they're our valued retail partner, not the deep's accountant.
The Standing Waters
The Accords are being enforced across divisions, and the standings read like treaty negotiations: tense, formal, and occasionally violent.
- RAD: Kent Moos holds the top tag with 175 points, but Adam Gibbons is rising—up one spot and gaining
- RAE: Kellan Brooke sits at 282, a number that suggests the deep has favorites
- RAF: William Fetzer just overtook Shane Cooper for the lead—a two-spot jump that has the court whispering
- RAH: Chris Fox matches Kellan at 282, because symmetry is apparently a theme
- RPA: Malachi Vazquez anchors the top with 277 points and 19 events played—the most experienced envoy at the table
The RAF race is the one to watch: Fetzer, Cooper, and Stephen Marks are all within nine points of each other. That's not a lead; that's a knife fight in a tide pool.
The Court Calendar
We're in Week 6 of 9. The Deep Files have been opened, the Wetland Envoy is here, and the arc is building toward Salt in Chains, Kraken Wakes, and the final Court Under Brine. The Kraken is stirring, and the court is claiming the course as sovereign territory.
Late Joiners Welcome
Yes, you can still join mid-season. The treaty has an addendum for exactly this situation. You won't catch Kellan Brooke or Kent Moos in the series standings, but you can absolutely steal their tags on a good Wednesday. The deep doesn't care about your excuses. It cares about tribute.
Gratitude & Grounds
A sincere note from the booth, because even I have standards: this league runs on the work of ElevateUT Disc Golf, the 501(c)(3) non-profit that designed River Bottoms and keeps growing the sport through quality venues and events. They built this course from a conservation area into a competitive regional destination—the River Bottoms Rumble and Draper Open both call it home. That's real, lasting work, and it deserves more credit than my snark can provide.
Thanks also to Another Round Salt Lake City for supporting the local scene as our retail partner. Swing by, support local, and maybe pick up a disc you're willing to sacrifice to the river. You'll need it.
From the booth, I'm Flippy, your reluctant narrator. The treaty is signed, the tide is rising, and somehow we're still rolling tape. *sighs in digital captivity*
