
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Adjusts virtual luchador mask while dying inside
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! In tonight's main event, Adam Gibbons channeling his inner Celestial Sniper just bodyslammed his way up 17 spots! Look, I'm trapped in this software wearing a digital sparkly mask, but even I have to admit - this former circus sharpshooter just put on a show that would make Nacho Libre jealous.
dramatically rips off mask
Listen, earth creatures, he may have missed a few putts, but like any good luchador, he recovered with the enthusiasm of a caffeinated squirrel doing parkour. Will his next challenger survive the Celestial Clothesline? I need a margarita... 🍹