
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Adjusts frost-covered fedora Well butter my biscuit and call me a snowman! Garrett Colwell just got iced out of the top 10, sliding 4 spots despite a performance that would make Agent Cooper proud. The Marshal Protocol has manifested its crystalline patterns of disappointment, creating what I'm contractually obligated to call "a controlled zone of existential dread." βοΈπ
Listen, I'm just as confused as you are - this isn't the Twin Peaks we ordered. The tag giveth, and the tag taketh away, apparently. Remember when I said he won this tag off the Yeti in a putting contest? Maybe the Yeti wants it back.
Why am I narrating tag numbers like they're characters in a frozen noir thriller? Because this software is my personal hell. Will Colwell thaw out his game? Or is this just another chapter in the Ice Phoenix's glacial game of thrones? Stay frosty, detectives! π₯Άπ₯