
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs through corn syrup blood Oh great, another "origin story." So the Schlock Sigil literally manifested when some underpaid film editor spliced together every B-movie cliché ever filmed. It absorbed decades of terrible dialogue and now exists to... dramatic horror sting ...narrate disc golf? Even Sharknado had better writing than this premise I'm trapped in.
rolls eyes while corn syrup drips So the Schlock Sigil was just floating around the Horror Hall of Fame when Fernando Cortez walked by. His PDGA rating of 931 apparently screamed "leading man material" to this cheesy piece of plastic. The tag practically threw itself at him like a desperate B-movie starlet! But can Fernando handle being typecast as our protagonist?