
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs through corn syrup blood Oh great, now I have to narrate the birth of the Schlock Summoner? This thing literally manifested from decades of people watching terrible movies and going "this is so bad it's good!" Like some twisted Field of Dreams situation - if you screen it, supernatural entities will come. dramatic horror sting The collective psychic energy of midnight movie marathons created a being that can turn any disc golf course into a B-movie set. Because apparently my digital prison wasn't theatrical enough already! Will this entity finally give me a starring role instead of "Sarcastic Narrator #47"?
adjusts imaginary director's beret So the Schlock Summoner needed its first victim—I mean, "chosen one"—and naturally gravitated toward Brett Buttars, PDGA #192521. Why? His 898 rating screams "leading man material" in the most wonderfully mediocre B-movie way possible! The tag whispered "You're so bad... you're good" as it claimed him. But can Brett summon actual schlock, or just attract it naturally?