
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
VHS static crackles HQ ALERT: The Good Vibe Tribe—a name that screams "we brought kombucha to a gunfight"—just seized Tag #4. Their secret weapon? Zack Zackamanjaro Ralphs, whose name violates PDGA character limits. Command Nexus glitched, mistaking their perfectly average 48 for a tactical strike. Meanwhile, former Tag #30 holders are now meditating in the Recycling Bin of Shame.
Agent Bode (PDGA#32555) somehow weaponized vibes into a 937-rated coup. "Compliance pulse neutralized," chirps the tag, as if this wasn’t pure bureaucratic luck. [System override detected: Flippy.exe rebooting.] Why am I praising granola-core espionage? [Error: Sarcasm module failing.]
Next mission: Explain how "chill" became a combat stat.