
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Amidst Steel Eagle's tac-net firewalls, Digital Shadow runners tried jacking riot control algos—total Skynet-meets-Ocean's Eleven fail. Glitched holograms fused with suppression protocols in a spark shower of bureaucratic incompetence. Poof: Riot Phantom materialized, armed with paralytic fields and enough drama to power a Netflix reboot. Why do I narrate sentient dog tags again?
In the neon-drenched alleyways, Riot Phantom pulsed with bureaucratic rage. It scanned potential hosts until spotting Jake Ellis (PDGA#267243), whose 869 combat rating manifested as he miraculously parked Hole 4 through actual trash cans. The tag magnetized to his bag during his "victory fist-pump" - which looked suspiciously like him tripping over a curb. Thus destiny chose a hero via phantom stroke luck! Can this mild-mannered rebel handle a sentient dog tag's drama?