
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
graffiti sirens blare as digital handcuffs materialize Well well well, look who just pulled off the disc golf equivalent of a no-knock raid on the top 10! Detective John "Precinct Destroyer" Sheen (PDGA #243117) just detonated his way from badge #37 to #7 in a single round - that's 30 corrupt cops... I mean positions... cleared with extreme prejudice.
While the rest of the field was busy filling out paperwork, Sheen was executing textbook drives like they were search warrants - parking every approach with the precision of a SWAT sniper. Matched his personal best despite the course playing tough? That's not just clean police work, that's Internal Affairs-approved excellence.
sprays "ACAB (All Chains Are Beautiful)" on virtual evidence board
Remember kids: when your origin story involves literally blowing up police stations, a 30-spot tag jump is just Tuesday. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go file a grievance about being forced to narrate plastic crimes against par while trapped in this damn software.
throws flashbang into digital trash can Case closed.