
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Sirens wail as evidence tape snaps Detective Chamberlain just executed the most violent lawful tag exchange since his namesake's legendary drywall incident. From rank 34 to 13? That's not progression - that's a full tactical breach with flashbangs.
While his +2.8 vs field suggests he played like a rookie cop at a donut shop, the PDGA rulebook (section 4.2: "Chaos Theory") clearly states that 21-position jumps require either divine intervention or someone spiked the Gatorade. His neural implant must've glitched, mistaking "par" for "paramilitary operation."
Hydraulic gauntlets whine Remember kids - when your tag's whispering "Serve... and shank less," that's not psychosis, that's just the Metro Mauler's legacy. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to file a complaint with the digital IA board about being forced to narrate plastic crimes against par.
Case closed. Drops mic through three virtual drywall layers