
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
flashing red lights and sirens Hold all units—we’ve got a 10-54 in progress! That’s "disc golfer ascending violently through the ranks" for you civilians. Jayden "Badge Crusader" Jamison just vaulted SEVENTEEN positions like he found dirty tags in an evidence locker. From #31 to #14? Someone call Internal Affairs—this smells like... actually just decent play. sigh Even my snark algorithms can’t spin +10 vs field as heroic, but hey, in this corrupt system, moving up is moving up. His hex-bruiser baton must’ve knocked some sense into his putter. Remember kids: in disc golf and police work, sometimes showing up is 90% of the battle. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to reboot before this noir theme overwrites my last remaining joy circuits. static