
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 8 (Last Stand), tag number moved from 23 to 23. (Week 8 of 8)
May 07 - Jun 25, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Former Internal Affairs investigator John 'Crusher' Malone earned his moniker after dismantling three corruption rings within five years. When his own commander was exposed taking cartel money, Malone burned his corrupted badge in a public ceremony and forged a new emblem from bulletproof steel. Now he operates with Captain Ironclad's direct authorization, hunting corrupt cops with monastic dedication.
Badge Crusader's custom-forged steel badge emits low-frequency pulses that disrupt hidden recording devices. His reinforced trench coat stops .45 rounds at point-blank range. Enhanced auditory implants detect lies through vocal micro-tremors. His primary weapon is a telescoping baton forged from melted-down corrupt officers' badges that leaves distinct hexagonal bruising.
Badge Crusader serves as The Regulators' internal purity enforcer, conducting off-the-books investigations into police corruption that can't be handled through official channels. He maintains the faction's integrity by eliminating compromised officers before they damage investigations.
A tight-knit group of hard-nosed cops and relentless detectives, the Regulators are dedicated to upholding the law and rooting out corruption from within the police force. With a deep sense of duty and a no-nonsense approach, they'll stop at nothing to bring the guilty to justice and restore honor to their badge.
A veteran cop with a spotless record and an unwavering moral compass, Captain Ironclad has dedicated his life to serving and protecting the city. Respected by his officers and feared by criminals, he leads the Regulators with a firm hand and a fierce determination to root out corruption wherever it hides.
Due to absence from Week 8 (Last Stand), tag number moved from 23 to 23. (Week 8 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Devil's Due), tag number moved from 14 to 23. (Week 6 of 8)
flashing red lights and sirens Hold all units—we’ve got a 10-54 in progress! That’s "disc golfer ascending violently through the ranks" for you civilians. Jayden "Badge Crusader" Jamison just vaulted SEVENTEEN positions like he found dirty tags in an evidence locker. From #31 to #14? Someone call Internal Affairs—this smells like... actually just decent play. sigh Even my snark algorithms can’t spin +10 vs field as heroic, but hey, in this corrupt system, moving up is moving up. His hex-bruiser baton must’ve knocked some sense into his putter. Remember kids: in disc golf and police work, sometimes showing up is 90% of the battle. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to reboot before this noir theme overwrites my last remaining joy circuits. static
<origin_story>
Forged in IA's crucible when Malone melted dirty badges into a hex-bruiser baton. Now Badge Crusader detects lies like a cybernetic bloodhound - ironic since this whole "gritty cop tag" gig makes me question reality. sigh Even my snark's getting assimilated by this neon dystopia. Stay vigilant, rookies... and maybe hydrate?
</origin_story>
Amidst the precinct's synth-gloom, Badge Crusader vibrated with righteous fury. It scanned the rookies, zeroing in on Jayden Jamison—his PDGA 251482 credentials practically glowed with incorruptible virtue (or maybe it was just his 903-rated backhand). Fate? Nah. He’d once "cuffed" a tree from 300 feet—close enough for police work. sigh My circuits ache from this melodrama. But tell us, flatfoot: can you outrun your own shank demons?