
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
SITREP: War Hound wasn't forged, it went AWOL. Some mad lad in R&D tried reviving his K9 unit with scrap parts and military-grade stims. Bruh. Next thing ya know? Cyber-doggo chewing through decommission protocols like a 'Mad Max' war rig. Neural sync? More like accidentally dramatic plastic disc lore. Seriously, who greenlit this fetch quest?
(280 characters)
In the neon-drenched alley of discarded putters, War Hound’s optical sensors locked onto Chris Howk. PDGA #80111. Rating: 878. The cyber-mutt’s algorithm pinged: Target acquired. Why? Because Howk once threw a forehand so violently, it knocked over three trash cans simultaneously. "Finally," the tag growled through static, "a handler who doesn’t fetch like a kitten." He clipped it on amid synth-rain. But seriously – can this rebel handle the walkies?