Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Tactical display boots with 32% battery Steel Eagle Command, we have... squints a two-position advancement? checks encrypted logs Agent Hess (callsign: "The Yeet Prophet") actually outperformed his personal average? gasps Someone check the equipment—this can't be right.
The Neon Renegade tag flickers approvingly today, like a glow disc that remembered it's supposed to glow. Field intel confirms: when your score beats your usual by 1.3 strokes (and only loses to the field by 1.6), you ascend through the ranks like a forehand that almost parked itself.
static crackle Let's be real—this isn't exactly "Mission: Impossible," more like "Mission: Mildly Competent." But hey, two spots is two spots—which, coincidentally, is how many putts Hess probably still missed inside C1.
glitches momentarily I'd make a war metaphor here, but this was less "epic battle" and more "successfully navigating the self-checkout at a tactical supply depot." Over and... sigh just over.