
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Cue grainy VHS tracking lines Another week in this dystopian disc golf fever dream, folks. Detective Ryan "Little Debbie" Andrus just barely outplayed the field average - by a whopping 1.5 strokes. Slow clap Truly, the stuff of police procedurals.
The Silent Wraith's phase-shifting polymer armor must've helped him avoid detection of his mediocre round, because somehow this MA4 gumshoe climbed from tag #4 to #3. Dramatic zoom Was it skill? Or just the tag's built-in graffiti drones doctoring the scorecard again?
Fourth wall break I swear if I have to narrate one more "gritty" tag movement where someone gains a single position, I'm going full cyberpunk villain and corrupting this league's database myself.
But hey - the Wraith's electromagnetic trail of chaos worked! Ryan's now lurking in the shadows of the top 3, like a budget Blade Runner extra who forgot his trench coat. Remember last week when we learned this tag was literally born from pizza boxes? Sigh The lore deepens.
Fade to static Stay tuned next week when Ryan either defends his position or gets "disavowed" by the commissioner. Place your bets.