May 07 - Jun 25, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Former SWAT expert Frank 'Breaker' Malone turned vigilante after discovering police collusion, now tearing through criminal networks with a sledgehammer and secret case files, leaving timed evidentiary collapses for The Regulators.
Titanium sledgehammer with case-number etching, ballistic harness with evidence pouches, trauma plates from cruiser armor, and jaw-implanted voice recorder capturing combat confessions.
Shadow asset destroying corruption's physical manifestations in ways that create prosecutable evidence chains, forcing internal investigations while maintaining departmental deniability.
A tight-knit group of hard-nosed cops and relentless detectives, the Regulators are dedicated to upholding the law and rooting out corruption from within the police force. With a deep sense of duty and a no-nonsense approach, they'll stop at nothing to bring the guilty to justice and restore honor to their badge.
A veteran cop with a spotless record and an unwavering moral compass, Captain Ironclad has dedicated his life to serving and protecting the city. Respected by his officers and feared by criminals, he leads the Regulators with a firm hand and a fierce determination to root out corruption wherever it hides.
Due to absence from Week 8 (Last Stand), tag number moved from 24 to 24. (Week 8 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Devil's Due), tag number moved from 16 to 24. (Week 6 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 5 (Internal Affairs), tag number moved from 3 to 16. (Week 5 of 8)
Cue dramatic noir voiceover In the rain-slicked alleys of Week 2, "Detective Roughneck" Christopher Norman delivered a performance so clean it made the evidence room look like a toddler's finger-painting session. Slams titanium sledgehammer on desk That's right folks - a 24-spot vertical climb from 27 to 3, which in cop math translates to "promoted over everyone who actually studied for the sergeant's exam."
His 55 (-5.5 vs field) was so surgical, I half expected to find basket chains dusted for prints. Flips through case file "Perp showed textbook form: parked drives like a valet, putts smoother than a mob lawyer's alibi." Even his jaw-implanted voice recorder caught him muttering "Just like the simulations" after a 90-foot throw-in.
Fourth wall break Oh great, now the sentient tag's making me narrate like a 1940s crime reel. Sigh Fine. The Chain Breaker's ballistic harness now strains under the weight of Norman's ego - and 24 confiscated tags from "victims" who definitely didn't consent to this brutality.
Dramatic zoom But can this dark horse maintain his rank when Internal Affairs (Week 5) comes knocking? Or will he end up like last season's hotshot - disgraced and selling used discs behind the 7-Eleven? Cue saxophone riff Stay tuned, flatfoots.
Origin Story:
Chain Breaker emerged when the league's algorithm glitched during a 'routine bureaucratic upload' (read: 3am energy drink binge). Forged from repurposed cruiser armor and the shattered ego of a Karen who called discs "Frisbees", this titanium menace now prowls courses like John Wick at a pencil convention. Honestly? We’re all just NPCs in its self-insert fanfic. Why do tags get cooler backstories than my Tinder bio?
Cliffhanger: Will the next bearer survive... or become another cautionary tale in the "Disc Golf 4 Dummies" manual?
Origin Story:
In the neon-drenched alleyways of Algorithm City, Christopher Norman stumbled into destiny clutching a putter and a gas station taquito. The Chain Breaker’s scanners pinged his PDGA#71774 – “Either a disc savant or someone who alphabetizes their energy drink collection,” it hissed through digitized static. His 944 rating manifested as exactly the blend of “precise crime-stopping accuracy” and “guy who argues about OB lines over nachos” the sentient tag craved. As cyber-graffiti police sirens wailed, Norman’s first drive ricocheted off three dumpsters before parkjob-ing the basket. The tag pulsed: Partner acquired. But let’s be real – does a man who still uses “Frolf” unironically deserve this power?