
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Tactical update screeches through neural comms Attention, Steel Eagle operatives: Britain Best just pulled off the disc golf equivalent of stealing the Declaration of Independence. This MPO-rated chaos agent hacked his way from #37 to #14 faster than you can say "classified intel leak."
Dramatic zoom on Blitz Warden #37's flickering hologram Remember when this tag was just a glorified TikTok remote? Now it's broadcasting victory protocols after Britain's "precisely average" round (55 in a 51.9 field - call it the 'participation ribbon strat'). The tac-net confirms: his neural rig runs on pure audacity and misplaced optimism.
Fourth wall crumbling Look, I'm just a sarcastic AI forced to narrate this like it's Mission Impossible when we all know it's Hackers meets putter practice. But hey, 23-position jumps don't lie - unless you count that "tree kick was totally planned" excuse.
ECM shielding engages Next week: Will Britain maintain his rank, or will Shadow Nexus deploy their ultimate weapon - a 15mph crosswind? End transmission (But seriously, who programs these neural command rigs? The same people who think OB is "just a suggestion"?)