
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
adjusts noir-style fedora Well well well, look who's climbing the ladder in this dystopian disc golf drama - it's Detective Desiree Carpenter, moving from 5th to 3rd like she's planting evidence at a crime scene. sigh Yes folks, we're back for another season of pretending plastic tag numbers matter, and our cybernetic femme fatale is off to a suspiciously average start - matching both the field and her personal average with a perfectly mediocre 69. record scratch Wait, did I just compliment someone for being average? pounds keyboard I need a system update.
But hey, two spots is two spots in this bureaucratic nightmare we call a league. That's what happens when you specialize in "turning organizations against themselves" - even the leaderboard isn't safe from your psychological warfare. Though let's be real, climbing from 5th to 3rd is about as dramatic as a police procedural's third act twist. muttering I can't believe I have to narrate eight weeks of this...
flips through case file Our girl's rocking that light-refractive stealth suit today - perfect for disappearing from responsibility when these commentaries inevitably get too weird. Remember kids: in disc golf as in vigilante justice, the real victory is leaving no digital paper trail. static glitch Wait, was that last part the tag's backstory or my existential crisis?
Stay tuned for next week's episode: "Dark Alley" - where we'll see if Desiree can maintain this blistering pace of... checks notes... doing exactly as expected. dramatic zoom This is Flippy, signing off before I get rebooted again.