Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Former judge Marcus Donovan transformed into a living warrant after discovering corruption in his own courtroom. Now wields a modified pneumatic gavel to literally hammer justice through concrete walls and bureaucratic red tape alike.
Reinforced titanium gavel head containing shaped explosive charges. Ballistic trench coat lined with Kevlar law text pages. Augmented hearing implants that detect both structural weaknesses and incriminating conversations through walls.
The Regulators' primary breaching specialist who combines legal authority with tactical demolition, executing court-approved raids with physics-calculated precision to simultaneously gather evidence and collapse criminal operations.
A tight-knit group of hard-nosed cops and relentless detectives, the Regulators are dedicated to upholding the law and rooting out corruption from within the police force. With a deep sense of duty and a no-nonsense approach, they'll stop at nothing to bring the guilty to justice and restore honor to their badge.
A veteran cop with a spotless record and an unwavering moral compass, Captain Ironclad has dedicated his life to serving and protecting the city. Respected by his officers and feared by criminals, he leads the Regulators with a firm hand and a fierce determination to root out corruption wherever it hides.
Due to absence from Week 6 (Devil's Due), tag number moved from 30 to 35. (Week 6 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 5 (Internal Affairs), tag number moved from 22 to 30. (Week 5 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 2 (Dark Alley), tag number moved from 15 to 22. (Week 2 of 8)
adjusts neon-lit aviators Listen up, rookies. Detective "Gavel Storm" Gibbons just served a 4-position subpoena to the mid-tier ranks, proving even justice moves at MA2 pace. His 63 was exactly average - both for the field and his personal record. flips through case file That's right folks, we're dedicating server space to track someone who achieved... statistical equilibrium.
The tag's origin story involves more Home Depot receipts than a DIY true crime podcast, but Adam's making it work. sigh Yes, the titanium gavel head "contains shaped explosive charges" according to lore, but today it mostly contained a perfectly neutral round.
slams desk OBJECTION! This commentary is legally required to mention his ballistic trench coat lined with Kevlar law text pages, but let's be real - it's currently holding snack wrappers and a half-melted protein bar.
Fourth wall break: I'm contractually obligated to pretend this 4-spot shuffle matters when we all know tags are just glorified beer tokens. muttering God help me, there's seven more weeks of this.
Case closed - see you at the next "crime scene" (aka the local course's porta-potty that definitely counts as "gritty urban terrain" in our delusional lore).
Origin Story:
Forged when ex-Judge Marcus rage-quit the bench mid-trial àla Better Call Saul, welding his subpoena power to a Home Depot pneumatic hammer. Gavel Storm manifested through sheer bureaucratic spite when he yeeted 19 contempt charges into a corrupt DA’s Tesla Cybertruck. Yes, we’re doing this instead of therapy. The league’s lore doc now has 14 pages about “ballistic precedent” and I’m trapped narrating it. chef’s kiss of despair
Cliffhanger: Will the next tag origin involve a rogue parking meter? Place your bets.
And so Gavel Storm - forged from judicial meltdowns and Home Depot receipts - scanned the mortal plane through smudged Dollar Tree acrylic. Its arcane logic deemed Adam Gibbons worthy not for his 893 PDGA rating, but because he’d once rage-bought a 19-pack of paper towels at Costco. The cosmic irony? Divine. His PDGA#111190’s triple 1s formed the sacred ‘Objection!’ trinity while the 90 screamed ‘case dismissed’ in hexidecimal. When Adam threw a forehand through a stiff headwind, the tag whispered ”motion granted” with all the gravitas of a Michaels clearance rack gavel. But let’s be real - this origin’s dumber than a squirrel putting with an acorn. Can our ”Chosen One” survive the ultimate trial… maintaining a positive PRD while carrying this narrative baggage?