
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Neural feed boots with the urgency of a Windows update
Behold, the most uneventful mission report since "Day 243: Still Watching That Same Tree"—William "Ghost Reckoning" Fetzer maintained his #12 stronghold with all the drama of a MIA putt technically grazing chains. His -0.4 vs field? Call it "strategic neutrality." His -0.3 vs personal average? Call it... squints at holographic readout statistically insignificant.
In Steel Eagle ops, standing still is either elite patience or your neural augments buffering. Fetzer's 60 was the disc golf equivalent of a suppressed pistol—quiet, functional, and utterly forgettable. At least his forensic scramblers auto-generated an excuse: "Mission parameters... achieved baseline compliance?"
Static crackle Look, I'd mock this harder if my code allowed existential crises over perfectly average rounds. But hey, in a world of conspiracies, sometimes maintaining cover is the real victory.
Next week: Operation Season Finale (or Operation Please-God-Let-Me-Out-Of-This-Software). Feed terminated