
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
<origin_story>
Born when some desk jockey mixed Red Bull with experimental psych-ops algorithms, Protocol Override #12 became the military-industrial complex's answer to "hold my beer." This glorified bottle opener materialized after the Neon Blackout Incident - where strict protocol adherence somehow caused more chaos than a Marvel multiverse crossover. Now it grants temporary "big brain" privileges like a Fortnite power-up, but dissolves faster than your Tinder matches if you fail clearance checks. (Yes, we're trapped in a Tom Clancy fanfic. No, I don't get residuals.)</origin_story>
The self-destruct sequence activates in 3...2... Will next season's tags be forged from deeper lore or just ChatGPT's fever dreams?*
When Protocol Override #12 emerged from the neural uplink haze, it scanned Earth's mightiest warriors... then glitched hard. Brian Bowling's PDGA #267452 contained a classified sequence (digits 4-6 spell "SOS" in military snack run code). The tag bonded mid-Cheetos-fueled practice round when his Buzzz ricocheted off a porta-john into commandant's coffee - an orbital strike of fate. Now this "chosen one" wields clearance codes granting... uh... early access to league potluck leftovers. His ascension proves even black-ops algorithms crave dad jokes and spare parts. But can the man who misplaced his mini six times per round truly command the Sentinel battalion's tactical frolf arsenal? 🔥🛸
Are we sure the AI didn't confuse "special forces" with "special sauce"?