
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
The Void Whistle Selection Protocol
When Matt Berman's PDGA#298988 accidentally decrypted to "29-89-88: Taco Tuesday Overlord" in Steel Eagle's quantum mainframe, the Nexus Alpha tag imprinted on his soul and his Zuca cart. Witness his ascension during a "routine" Creekside patrol where he tripped into a 450ft forehand (read: shanked putter) that somehow activated dormant cyber-gremlins. Now he wields a tag that translates "tree love" into tactical advantage.
But does a man who still bags a Groove™ deserve orbital strike privileges?