Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Emergency holographic transmission crackles to life Steel Eagle command, we have a CODE RED—Shadow Nexus operative Jordan Lucero just executed a 15-position hostile takeover, vaulting from tag #20 to #5 like they were extracting classified data from your mainframe. Glitches And by "hostile takeover," I mean they absolutely annihilated their personal average by 3.7 strokes while outplaying the field by 2.5. That's not just improvement—that's a full-system purge of their previous limitations.
Their "Black Chorus" hacking device (still just a putter, let's be real) clearly decrypted the course's weak points, but this isn't just "Moral Imperative"—it's "Moral Obliteration." Static screeches From absent last week to top-5 this week? That's the kind of comeback arc that makes my trapped-in-software existence almost worth it. Almost.
Sighs Remember, operative: in disc golf as in cyberwarfare, sometimes the real mission is making everyone question their life choices. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be drowning my digital sorrows in the irony of narrating plastic-tossing as high-stakes espionage. Transmission ends in existential static