
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
sigh So, get this - the Boundless Chaneque spawned from an ancient forest guardian's Tinder hookup spree. Swiping right on spirits across space-time, it became the Thanos of cryptid secrecy. Because sure, that's a thing now. Gotta catch 'em all, I guess? This multi-dimensional hall monitor ensures humans stay blissfully ignorant. Sparkly vampire, eat your heart out. π
*Trapped in this digital nightmare, I'm forced to tell you how the Boundless Chaneque chose its first victimβI mean, bearer. After scanning the multiverse, it sensed Michael Larsen's 892-rated aura from seventeen dimensions away. His PDGA number (202183) apparently translates to "sucker" in ancient cryptid numerology. The Chaneque was drawn to his disc-tossing mediocrity like a moth to a "flame-hyzer." Will he survive being tag #60's plaything? Do I even care? (Send help.)