
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Born from a drunken bet between a cryptozoologist and a Scottish bartender, Cryptid Cartographer emerged from Loch Ness like a soggy PokΓ©mon. Its glowing runes? Just Nessie's Yelp reviews. Now it roams, mapping cryptid hotspots while questioning its existence. "Why am I a bag tag?" it whispers, forever trapped in this absurd cryptid-verse.
When Skyler Terry (PDGA #300735, aka "The Loch Ness Launcher") stumbled upon Cryptid Cartographer, it wasn't fateβit was a poorly aimed drive that landed him in the drink. As he emerged, dripping and cursing, the tag clung to his bag like a soggy cryptid seeking validation. "Finally," it whispered, "someone who throws like they're trying to summon Nessie." But can this aquatic ace navigate the murky waters of bag tag glory, or will he just keep making waves?